I've found a friend who died for me

Okay lately haven't been online much is cause computer got problem and cause I went for camp . Wow , camp was really really refreshing and I really learnt a lot . One thing that struck me was that I really felt the joy in serving although like I just went round doing my job I really felt joy in serving ad that's how it should be like . When we serve with a glad sincere heart we should feel joy in serving . And also learnt that SOW is not a method of what but it's a lifestyle , we should live life like we're SOW-ing 24/7 and so that's what I've decided to do when Gideon asked us to make a decission on what we want to do after camp . And maybe some of you can tell that I've changed but my parents seem to disagree and not everyone can tell that I'm changing but that's why , I want to live life as if everyone can tell that I'm a child of God and I'm not ashamed of it neither am I afraid to show it . I want to be able to really be a role model for all and also be able to bring God's presence into non-believers' lives and also my family's . And I'm determined that after I've achieved this my parents will change their mentality and image of me so that they'll allow me to go for 11 March 2010's WATER BAPTISM . WOOOOOOOOOOOOO ! Okay , so anyway , I agree with what Gideon said although I missed half of it ? He said that as girls we shouldn't let out emotions get to us and also we shouldn't follow those others girls in gossiping and bringing others down so we feel more superior . That issn't the way God wants us to be and that's not the image we want to give to non-believers and also we should learn to stand on principles like how I learnt in character study . When we stand firm on our principles God will reward us and we'll really be able to affect more people around us . And also like what Pastor Jeff said , 'We can have emotions but we can't be emotional' . Personally I know that I'm a very emotional person , I have problems controlling my emotions because I guess I just.. Am like that ? But I don't want to be like that any more because if I can't let my emotions become my masters for I can't serve two masters like what it says in ,
Matthew 6:24
"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.
And I really agree with this so if you see me being too emotional stop me and give me a good lecture and scolding . I also learnt that my shepherd is not my fist aid box but only my map I think that I rely on Wenzhen too much sometimes cause I guess it's very easy to get very comfortable with her cause she's really caring and she always go an extra mile for everyone . But I want to be more independant , and yesterday I opened a can by myself , as in use can opener and open because I very noob one larh , everything also don't know how to do cause I've been spoiled and like I don't know how to do a lot of things . But anyway , now of days I find that I've kept going to her every single little thing that pops up . But our shepherds are there to move us closer to God and not themselves and I think this will be very useful for me when I myself become a shepherd . I really thank God for opening up my eyes to many things and I really thank God for everything that has happened and for everyone around me . There's always a reason why God put us with the people we're with . And there's always something to learn from them or we're there to help or guide them . And Sunny really thought me something , although he hardly had the time to spend with us he was so overjoyed that he could just come and spend a few hours , and I got to come full time , I think God wants to remind me to be grateful about every single little thing that He blesses us with . Be it the food or even everyday that we recieve . And Sunny also mentioned that if Hillsong serves the same God and reads the same bible , if they can influence so many people then why can't we ? I really think it's true and that really encouraged me . And also I was encouraged by this Girl who served usher doing camp , she wanted to join usher but she hasn't gotten any news yet , then we were standing at the same place so we were just getting to know each other better . Then I told her that I can't speak in tongues and it's really been very long because one of my camp objectives was to learn how to speak in tongues but I still can't larh but she told me that she had a very strong prompting from the holy spirit to pray for me . During her prayer she said that I was ready and that she really had a lot of faith in me . I hardly knew her but she had so much faith in me I was really touched by her because she really believed in me and she help me not to upset when I haven't recieved tongues cause if she has so much faith in me then how can I not have faith in myself ? But I really learnt to trust in God and to be contented with what He has blessed me with and what He still is blessing me with . I really enjoyed my time in camp and I had a great time talking to Alvina and Emily , Emily helped me to position myself in someone else's shoes and I finally understand larh why this person is this way and I can't blame her and like I remember that the hillsong guy said that 'who are we to judge' . That really strucked me because it's true , 'who am I to judge' God doesn't count how many sins we have committed and He counts us as a sinner by whether we sin or not He doesn't count us more or less a sinner . And sometimes I may think like , 'walao how come this person so not spiritual one' I mean what gives us the right to judge this person ? I'm not perfect and neither is anyone except Jesus and God . And therefore only they have the right to judge . And one of my camp objective was to bond more with the lifegroup but I served quite a lot so I didn't manage to spend as much time as I thought I would but I want to thank God that today Emily , Baoer , Jasmine and Wenzhen took the effort to come down to fellowship and I also wanted to thank God that my mother allowed me to go . And although not many people came but I still got to fellowship with them and they really made my day by taking time out to come and fellowship together , I mean they can be doing something else right ? But they chose to come to fellowship together as a lifegroup . And I'm very blessed to have all these people around me , and that's why I wanted to start being the wall of affirmation . To not only my lifegroup but also others around me . Because I feel good being appreciated as an usher , I'm sure some of you can relate as ushers like sometimes we don't feel appreciated when we serve but I want to thank God for those who really say thank you it really makes a big difference and also that's how I want to appreciate others so that they continue to come and to feel God's love . And I want to thank God for Wenzhen , I noticed that she has that child-likeness and child like faith that God wants us to have . I use to think that she's just immature but now come to think of it , it's not immaturity but child likeness , and she's not the most talented person but she tries her best in everything she does . Example like she's not altheletic but she still enjoys herself during the game and really take part in it . And I don't know if she herself knows this but it's because of her spirit of excellence that God backs her up on everything . She does her best and it's actually having faith in God . Haing the faith that He'll do the rest when you do your best . And I think that she has shown me that , so what if I'm not talented in a lot of ways ? I can still try my best in everything that I do . It's because of this she has come such a long way . And you know like what pastor Jeff said last time he was a bad singer but now he's a better singer may not be the best singer but he's improved right ? And I believe that it's true as we progress on , our weakness become less of a weakness . So what if we're imperfect ? That's what we're here for , to strive to become perfect just like Jesus . It's easy to want to do something but actually doing it , it's harder than you know it . And I really don't want to live a 'sian' life any more because when we said yes to God to let Him take over everything and surredering our all to Him was the day that we start living life to the fullest and living life to the fullest is to live an exciting life and that another good thing about Wenzhen , she always does thing like as if she hasn't done it before . And that's what makes it so exciting for her and that's also how we should treat everyday , we don't know what's going to happen . Then , we should be excited for what God has install for us . And I'm trying to be able to feel His presence all the time because it's not that He's not there but it's just that we're not aware of Him and we shouldn't live life alone because God is there and we're living life with Him and we shouldn't just call Him when we need help but we should also celebrate with Him . 'Tong Gan Gong Ku' <--- that's how we should live life with God , the ups and also the downs . And God thinks of us greater than how we think of ourselves and God won't give us something that we can't overcome and when we ask God for something , we must be prepared that He's going to test us in other for us to slowly gain what we want . If we always just get what we want then there's no point right ? When we ask God for something He'll give us even more than of what we asked for . And I learn that in order to gain I have to give . Even if I only give 5 minutes of my time , that 5 minutes could make a big difference . For example I spent those 5 minutes telling someone my life testimony , it could have really touched their hearts and they could have wanted to accept Christ there and then . And so only when we offer something God will multiply it . And I forgotten who preached this larh but it's true without discipline then there's no way we can move on because no matter how talented we are we need to be dicipline when we do anything . If we don't put in effort how can we expect to see a breakthrough ? And I agree that this age is the best time to moud ourselves to become more disciplined . Especially since I want to chiong in my studies next year . Without disicpline I can't go far . And I also learnt that compassion is not the same as pitty when you have comppassion you do something about it . You take action and pitty is just a feeling . And we shouldn't just talk but no actions . Go the extra mile for people and it's better to be a blessing then to recieve one . And I also learnt about servant hood and that we're all saved to do God's will and we odd to rise up to serve others to bring them closer to God . And that we shouldn't limit ourselves because we must have faith that God has created us to do more than what we think we can do . Always take up the challenge when you have the chance because you may not be sure if it's God's calling but there's no harm right ? And we shouldn't just learn something and not apply it then there's no point in learnin it right ? And everyone has a talent and that talent is used to make a difference in the kingdom of God . And firstly we have to find that talent then after finding it we should invest in it so can we can excel in it to really serve in the kingdom of God . And on the leadership teaching I agree all of us are leaders it's just a matter of a good leader or not . And we should learn to become better leaders and to rise up and lead people . God can glorify in any cirumstances . And I was really reminded that the old has gone and the new has come . Like I'm not sure who said it but each day actually the cycle is still repeating itself . Each day the old has gone and the new has come . God is shaping lfe character of His people . And I agree with what Pastor Jeff said , you'll produce who you are . I think I'm becoming more like Wenzhen... The willingness of being a servant I think it' very important because it also links with humility . And we odd to be humble like Jesus . And God will only use you when you're ready so don't worry , the right time will come . God calls His people in many different ways , it doesn't have to be like really really a cool way when God calls you to fulfill what He wants you to do . And we need to guard our hearts especially for girls because Satan will strike us at our hearts because we're more emotional people than Guys that's why we should be strong and not let our emotions get the better of us . Don't be a shooting star but a shinning star , a shooting star you can only see it for a short while but a shinning star you can see forever whenever in the night . When you're serious show it and we should be serious when we want to give our all to God . And really having the burning desire for God . And you know we should really set our hearts right before God . Because if we seek God 99.99% it's not good enough that's why when you want something you'll have to want it 100% and when you ernestly seek God you'll find Him . On the second day after I got to go back to the lifegroup , I was really drained out by usher so I wanted to still be able to praise and worship God 100% and I just sang my heart out and God just suddenly strengthen me and refreshed me . I hope all of you really gained a lot from camp . (: